Every person has a wish list. You know, the list of things you want but might not necessarily be able to have right now? For some people it’s a luxury car or a new house or a trip to an exotic destination. I definitely have a wish list like that! On it are some pretty fabulous trips, a walk-in closet like Cher had in the movie Clueless (a girl can dream, right?) and unlimited access to a fountain pop machine because I seriously love fountain pop, especially when I have a hangover!
But that’s just my regular wish list. I also have a mommy wish list. What is a mommy wish list, you ask? Well, dear reader, in case you don’t know, a mommy wish list is a list of things that every mother wants throughout the run of a week. The items might seem ridiculous to a non-parent but if you have kids, or had small children at one point in your life, you can totally relate.
My mommy wish list is really quite simple. All I want is….
To eliminate the bedtime battle. My daughter is spirited. Which is basically a polite way of saying she is stubborn. I do not begrudge her for it. She knows what she wants and when she wants it and I think that is an awesome quality in life because (hopefully) she will grow up not letting people walk all over her. However, when it comes to bedtime, it is TORTURE. She decided all by her smart little self that she was adjusting her bedtime to 9pm. I was okay with that. It’s on the late end of reasonable. But then she started pushing it and before I knew it, she was going to bed at 10! She’s not even two! So I am now trying to get her back on a schedule and it is really rough. She jumps out of bed and I have to firmly tell her over and over to please go back to bed and to go to sleep. I would LOVE to have a night where I put her down at 8pm and she’s out cold. I guess I better keep on wishing for that one because I don’t foresee it in my near future.
To eat a hot meal. I can’t remember the last time I got it sit down and really savour and enjoy a meal. I spend most of meal time trying to get my child to eat. It’s like she became a picky eater overnight. Suddenly she doesn’t like any of her favourite foods anymore. By the time I get her something to eat, a fresh drink, cut her food up and clean up any messes she might have made, my food is cold. I usually end up shovelling in whatever I can. And while food still has the basic same taste whether it’s hot or cold, certain items taste better hot. Hot steak, hot soup, hot mashed potatoes. Trust me when I say they don’t quite taste the same at room temperature.
To not have to clean 39358 times a day. Okay so that number is probably an exaggeration. But seriously, toddlers are the messiest people ever! They spill things and break things and throw things and lose things. And guess who cleans it all up? Yup, me. I do ask Charlotte to help me with tasks that are age appropriate for her but she still can’t use a broom or make a bed. She is a champ at picking up toys when she feels like it but that is also another battle that I sometimes don’t feel like facing. I would love to have a day where I don’t have to clean up spilled milk, or wipe down sticky furniture or find random toys tucked into my bed. I think her Little People toys are cute but rolling on one of those suckers in the middle of the night is painful enough to make a grown woman scream!
To sleep as late as I want. Oh sleep. How I miss you. All of those times I took sleep for granted are things I am kicking myself for now. I can’t even begin to tell you how chronically exhausted I am. Between working a full day, parenting all evening, having an interrupted sleep practically every other night and being up at the ass crack of dawn takes its toll on a person. My friends with older children tell me that this will eventually change and in a few years, my daughter will love sleep. But right now I still really REALLY miss it and could use a few days (or even a few weeks) of sleeping till whenever I feel like it. Adulting sucks sometimes!
To have alone time. I am an introvert. Some of you who know me might laugh when you read this because if you know me, you know I am not shy. But being an introvert doesn’t have anything to do with being shy. I like doing social things; but after doing social things, I need downtime so that I can reflect and decompress. Basically, I need a lot of alone time. But any parent can tell you that getting alone with while you have young kids is tough, especially when they are less than school aged. I love spending time with my daughter, she is my favourite person in the entire world. But there are day when I just CRAVE alone time. I like reading books and writing and doing activities that don’t always involve people. And that’s hard when you have a child who wants your undivided attention all of the time. I know most people say that alone time comes when your child goes to bed, but if you reread my first point, that’s a pretty big challenge for me and my kiddo! Usually by the time she goes to sleep, I am not far behind her.
All of these things are important to me, but they are not what is most important. And what is most important is my daughter and making sure she is happy, healthy, safe, secure and loved. So if that means I have to sacrifice sleep and alone time and hot meals, then so be it. Because one day I am going to wake up and be a mom to a teenager who is never home and I’ll probably be wishing a lot of these hectic and crazy moments back.
My mommy wish list is full of wants, but none of them are actual needs. It’s nice to get a break now and then (shout out to my parents who give me PLENTY of breaks to make sure my mommy wish list is a frequent reality) and it’s also nice to know that I am going to be getting plenty of breaks in the future. Our babies are only young for such a very short time. Eventually my mommy wish list will change and maybe ten years from now it will include different things. Maybe I’ll be wishing my daughter would spend more time with me or wishing that she wouldn’t sleep so late so we could do something fun together. Who knows? All I know is that right now my child is asleep and I am savouring this alone time by doing two of my favourite things; writing and drinking wine!